Spoonful Test Blog

Sunday, May 18, 2014

Internal monologue

Gibson hasn't been sleeping well lately, which is pretty much a huge bummer.  So I've found myself in his room snuggling him back to sleep at some point most nights, and my mind tends to wander.  So now, for your reading pleasure, is an example of my internal monologue while I try to get Gibson to sleep at night.
Man, this sucks.  Why isn't he sleeping well?  Could it be a sleep regression?  ...probably.  There's always a sleep regression.

Or maybe he's teething.  He's always teething.  I hate teeth.

...could be an ear infection.  That would be the worst.  Maybe I should call the pediatrician?

Awwwww, he's so sweet!  I wish I could snuggle him all night long!

...but I really wish he would just sleep.  That's all I want.

I wonder what I need to make for dinner tomorrow night?  Maybe we should go grocery shopping.  I think we're out of bananas.  That sucks.  I don't even know what he'll eat for breakfast.

HOLY CRAP WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?  Oh my gosh.  There's someone in the closet, and he's going to murder me.  I wish it wasn't so dark!  Maybe he won't kill me since I'm holding a baby.

...it was just Ellie flapping her ears in the hallway.  Don't be stupid, Erin!  There's obviously no one in the closet.

But what if there is?

If there was someone in the closet he would have come out ten minutes ago.  Stop being silly.

I think he's asleep!  Such a sweet angel.

Ok, here goes.  Putting Gibson down...and...SUCCESS!  He's not crying!  I'll just rub his belly for awhile.

...I wish I had put pants on.  It's cold in here.  Maybe that's why he won't sleep!  I'll turn the space heater on when I leave.

If there's someone in the closet, he's going to see me with no pants on.  How embarrassing.

...I wonder if Danny is watching us on the video monitor.  Or what if someone else is watching on the video monitor?  What if this is like The Truman Show and our life is actually a television show?

Maybe I should start wearing pants more often.
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1 comment :

  1. Oh my word, LOL!! Love it. Every part! ;) Especially when you rationalize that the murderer in the closet would have killed you 10 min ago if one was truly in there!


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