Spoonful Test Blog

Friday, October 3, 2014

No rest for the pregnant

So.  Pregnant sleep SUCKS.

It sucked last time, too, I just didn't have a fun blog on which to complain about it.

But for real, sleep is the worst these days.  These are the three sleep scenarios that have been plaguing me since this baby entered my uterus.

SCENARIO #1 (the least nefarious)
I go to bed exhausted.  I fall asleep fairly quickly, and sleep until 5:30.  I then wake up to pee, and never fall back asleep.  Which is sad, but not the worst thing in the world.

I go to bed exhausted.  I fall asleep fairly quickly, and then I startle myself awake at 2:30 because I have a scary ghost dream (or a dream about yoga pants zombies, of course).  I take a minute to settle myself down, go to the bathroom, and then flop back into bed.  And then I'm awake for two hours because my brain won't shut up, and I end up watching The Office until I finally fall asleep at 4:30.

I go to bed exhausted.  I lay there for an hour without falling asleep.  I realize that I'm hungry, so I get up and eat a snack.  Except on the way to the kitchen, I have the sudden urge to poop.  So I poop for thirty minutes (I have the slowest bowels ever), and then I get a snack.  While I'm eating my snack I watch tv and become WIDE AWAKE.  After my snack I realize that I'm nauseated, and start moaning to myself about how I hate being awake and nauseated.  I decide that maybe I'm nauseated because I need to eat more, so I eat yet another snack.  It works!  But now I'm even MORE wide awake.  So I go to the bathroom and then try and settle myself on the couch to try and sleep.  An hour later, I am still awake, and getting angry about it.  Finally, at 2:00 in the morning, I fall asleep.  I sleep badly because I'm on the couch.  At 6:00 I wake up and go to the bed.  Then I hear Gibson crying.  Oh good.  Danny goes to get Gibson and brings him to the bed to watch cartoons while he showers.  I lay there awake, cursing poor little Gibson.  When Danny gets out of the shower and is dressed, he takes Gibson to the living room and I start to fall asleep.  Then Gibson decides he misses me and runs into the bedroom shouting "MOM!  MOM!!  MOOOOOMMMM!  UP UP UP!"  And then he slams the door shut and begins to scream because he didn't want to be trapped in my room with me.  And then I wake up.  Very grumpy.

Would you like to know which scenario happened last night?  I'll give you a hint: I'm very grumpy today.

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1 comment :

  1. Those are for sure some very unpleasant scenarios, but let's see the good from the bad: Gibson loves you a lot and can't stay much time without his mommy.


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